Duplicity Inbox

[rockandrollvampire]

[Looking for your resident 80s loving, Madonna worshiping, nerd of a vampire? You've got him. Leave a message for Tobias Matthews here!

@ madonna4ever
text / voice / video / action

Comments

text; un: DonutDevourer

[goldenglasses]

[Vash is pretty sure this isn't real, but it seems fun so he's joining in.]

YOU'VE BEEN BLASTED BY THE

 (          )           )    *          
 )\ )    ( /(     (  ( /(  (  `     (   
(()/((   )\())  ( )\ )\()) )\))(  ( )\  
 /(_))\ ((_)\   )((_|(_)\ ((_)()\ )((_) 
(_))((_)__((_) ((_)_  ((_)(_()((_|(_)_  
/ __| __\ \/ /  | _ )/ _ \|  \/  || _ ) 
\__ \ _| >  <   | _ \ (_) | |\/| || _ \ 
|___/___/_/\_\  |___/\___/|_|  |_||___/ 
                                        

ONCE YOU'VE BEEN BOMBED, YOU HAVE TO BOMB 8 OTHER PEOPLE! IF YOU GET BOMBED AGAIN YOULL KNOW YOUR REALLY SEXY!!1 IF YOU DIFFUSE THE SEX BOMB CHAIN, YOULL SUFFER A VERY UNSEXY BRAIN INJURY! BOMB WHOEVER YOU THINK IS SEXY!!

text

[rockandrollvampire]

[Oh Hell no. He's not touching this shit with a ten yard pole.]

no dammit
no its NEVER like this
ITS ALWAYS A LIE

and theres a chance it fucks up your computer
or phone in this case
but still
its VERY BAD

[Somewhere far away, Dorian Gray is proud of his boyfriend has no idea why.]

[goldenglasses]

Oh, come on, it's not actually going to cause an unsexy injury. There is no such thing as unsexy in this city. You don't need to worry so much.

[rockandrollvampire]

you SAY that
but dyou know how many computers get ruined by this shit???
TOO MANY
its also very expensive to fix


I mean theres no links with this one
but still
i smell trouble

[goldenglasses]

Really? How do words break computers?

[rockandrollvampire]

theres a lot of mumbo jumbo that goes into it
that I really dont know at all
but if you click the wrong thing
or tell someone something you shouldn't
BOOM
entire computer down for the count
everything lost or destroyed
its
bad
.......trust me

[goldenglasses]

Huh. I never would have thought words could make a computer explode!

[rockandrollvampire]

[He needs to remember to stop being so literal with Vash. This man's at least as good a troll as he is.]

give it the right words and yeah
it can happen
metaphorically too
with losing everything on it

[goldenglasses]

[Vash does have some experience with computers. He knows the words won't really blow up the computer, but he's having fun with this now.]

Whoa! Really?! How do I know if I'm giving it the right words!? Shouldn't there be warnings about these sorts of things!?

[rockandrollvampire]

if you dont know the words
your mostly fine
don't open random things people you dont know send you
that's the big one.
that really fucks computers up

[Even if Vash knows this already, offering this advice means he's done his good deed for the month so he can now troll without concern as if he wasn't going to do that anyway.]

[goldenglasses]

Maybe I better send all the words that come over my phone to you first to be sure.

[rockandrollvampire]

im going to leave you on read if you do

[goldenglasses]

But how will I know what's safe!? You can't leave a man hanging!

[rockandrollvampire]

youll learn the hard way

[goldenglasses]

Well, if you won't save me then maybe this long lost prince I've been texting with will help me instead.

[rockandrollvampire]

[And this would be his moment to exit this conversation. Vash please.]

Im sure he will
best of luck with that mate

[Now he's going to leave Vash on read from here on out. Sir, you are somehow Too Much for a man who is the unliving definition of an internet troll.]

[goldenglasses]

Hey! He's got a great deal on some gold! Want in?

[rockandrollvampire]

[Nope. Just not responding. You do you, Vash. Toby's not touching this with a thousand foot pole.]